Wednesday, 4 August 2010

DOA: Dead or Alive - WARNING: This motion picture does not contain explicit portrayals of violence; sex; violent sex; sexual violence; clowns and violent scenes of violent excess, so is definitely suitable for all audiences.

Remember the bit about watching films in HD when they are shown. Well that's my excuse for watching this also. It's not terrible and it doesn't take itself seriously at all. It has some cool and equally ropey fight scenes and sticks in three scantily clad maidens to up the interest for the Teenage boy audience. Surely no other excuse for the volleyball scene????
Think of it as a poor mans Charlie's Angels (The Movie Remakes) if such a thing can be achieved and just take it or leave it.

Predator - M134 when you absolutely positively have to kill every mutha fucker in the jungle, accept no substitute.

Arnie sets off on a Jungle hunt with Jessie Ventura and Apollo Creed and some other mates to hunt down the most quintessential badass alien that has ever been created. Couple this with some awesome 80's scripted dialogue, a thunderous score from Silvestri and the meanest (hand)gun ever shown on screen in and you get one of the greatest sci-fi actioners created.

Trivia - Arnold is displaying enlightenment at the fact that he can't be seen because he is covered in clay. Man that guy can act.

First Blood - Back Home

Sly's best film? You decide
What it is, is a fantastic action movie with a little more depth and realism than it gets credit for. John Rambo, Vietnam vet, snaps when the local law enforcement get a little too heavy.  What ensues is Action movie gold.

The International - The World's Local Bank

Clive Owen, hereon referred to as 'The Plank' (a bit harsh as this is probably his least wooden performance) stars as a Interpol agent relentlessly investigating a huge banking organisation. Story reminds me a lot of Lord of War with Nic Cage,  because of the nod to the fact that Big Business runs and influences the whole world.
Set to a European back drop, this conspiracy thriller was always going to draw comparison to The Bourne trilogy of films. A shame, as if you do compare it then it will come up well short. The fast passed action and stylised editing of those films is not even attempted in this brooding thriller. Fixed cam landscapes a plenty on view in what is an engaging and thought provoking journey across the globe.
A nod to older movies and styles on show here and long may such things continue. You have to love the shoot out in the museum as well. It is stunning.

AVP: Requiem - ....and dark doesn't mean good, it means I can't see what the fudge is going on.....

Dark, plot-less, careless and pointless

AVP - The Games Master

As with Transformers, just having two sets of awesome bad guys kick the shit out of each other is not allowed. As is releasing what would be an awesome 30 minute flick in the pictures. So we have to mix in some human element and plotted story.
Paul WS Anderson gets good action fodder in his flick and knows his audience so this is simple stuff. TBF if it wasn't for the PG13 rating restricting the gore and the, let's be honest, pretty ropey first face off for the two protagonists then this is a pretty great attempt as far as shallow action movies go.
Mind you, I've seen it three times now, so it might be a good time to retire it from viewing. Nah can't do that. Colin Salmon and Henriksen being in this will always make me think it's worth another go.

Predators - Danger! Danger! Will Robinson

An action reboot and apparent sequel to the first Predator movie gets that billing for no apparent reason. Averagely dull action stars and too much of the bad stuff from King Kong and The Mist for me. You know, stupid CGI alien stuff.

Thing is, despite Brody being broody, Fishburne being great/fat and the rest being ok fodder. It just tries too hard. It seems an irrelevance to put these characters in various states of confusion when the majority of the viewers know what's coming. You just get no involvement or connection to their plight.

No bombastic score. No second half urgency. Laurence Fishburne is Tim Robbins in War of the Worlds. And a predictable seen it coming a mile off so a real shame it wasn't worth waiting for samurai scene.

Let Down. No better, but no worse than AVP, albeit for different reasons.

Predator 2 - It has not been a nice day

Take the first movie, move the shoot to an easier location to work in and crack on with making sequels the way they are supposed to be made. Set up the plot, kill off the characters and end with a massive chase/hunt.
Get some good action actors (Glover, Paxton, Bussey), Some bad un's (most of the rest) and some OTT ones (hey the mighty Paxton again :)) and remember that it's the man in the suit and the awesome score that really make this franchise. You'll be onto a winner.
Some shocking delivered lines from the Hispanic cops does not distract from the fact that this is the second best Predator movie.